I am asking about the original versions of these puns in here.
For example, to what is
He is the Alfa and the Romeo.
supposed to refer?
It refers to some verses in Revelation where God is referred to the Alpha and the Omega.
Another:
But God, in his Infiniti Mercedes, did Rolls away the Stanza.
Infinite Mercy...Roll away the Stone
Some of them are not well-known. For example:
Gearly beloved, we are Blazered here in the name of our Four-door, who art in Half-ton.
Attempted translation: Dearly beloved, we are (?) here in the name of our Father who art in Heaven
Is 'Blazered' supposed to be 'gathered'?
He ain't Chevy, he's my Beretta.
Beretta is maybe brother. What is Chevy supposed to be?
Also:
This is not a question about Christianity. As hilarious as this series of puns is, if you want to know what the author's inspiration for each pun was you should ask them not us. All we could do is speculate our way through the realm of somebody else's literary devices. – Caleb Dec 5 '15 at 8:52
What? A joke wouldn't really be funny to someone if that someone wouldn't get the joke, I believe. If you find 'He is the Alfa and the Romeo' funny, then I believe this is because you know Rev 22:13 or something related to Christianity. Even if Rev 22:13 is not what the author had in mind, I mean it's still something related to Christianity that would cause 'He is the Alfa and the Romeo' to be funny. I believe the author is not creating obscure references to Christianity for only the very highly learned to find humorous like Red Riding Hood's Gamma but is instead making obvious references to Christianity. Even if an answer is speculation or is not necessarily unique, any reference that can explain the joke should be allowed as answer, if the question is allowed to be posted, I guess.
Related:
What's up with churches and guitars in this joke from The Big Bang Theory?